June 11, 2007

Chat

Business…chat with me at 3 ET.  That’s now.

June 10, 2007

Is Something Wrong With Me?

Am I the only person seriously pining for the DVD release of Season Four of The Wire and/or Season Five?  It’s really getting difficult to wait.  David Simon, get this thang rollin’.  At the very least, can I get a release date on the DVDs???

June 9, 2007

Guess What?

I got engaged. Happy happy, joy joy for me!

Unfortunately, those are the best words I can give right now because it’s kinda difficult to put the magnitude of such a thing into words. Just know that there is no phrase harder to get out than “will you marry me?” Not just because of the awkwardness caused from being on one knee–a position few are ever on, unless you sing in a minstrel show–but because there’s absolutely no way you can say that and sound as cool and loving as you would prefer. You want to be able to say that with every bit of bass you have, and every bit of reassured confidence in the deepest recesses of your being. You wish you could channel those love songs you grew up with, the ones that used to sound good but only recently began to make perfect sense, for they no longer sound like idealistic hyperbole but, instead, like your own life.

But when the words come from your mouth, they sound as though you’ve gone back to a pre-pubescent time.

You fully take in the fact that someone is willing to put up with you and every flaw, fault and wart you’ve got from here until the end. You realize that you’re someone you think is absolutely magnificent to reciprocate that sentiment, to say she finds herself just as fortunate to have you as you know you are to have you. You’re asking for the ultimate reassurance, which flies in the face of the confidence you’re attempting to summon. You’re totally letting your guard down in the name of being happier than you’ve ever been, even though you’re already as happy as you imagined possible. With all that in the air, I’m surprised my voice didn’t crack.

But she said yes. Actually, she said “of course.” The smile on her face was priceless, something I’ll remember and hold on to for a long time.

That memory will come in extra handy when I’ve managed to do something to irk her (like about a half hour ago). It’s got a long-lasting “everything’s gonna be straight” effect. At least for a good while.

Thanks to Viva, AD and Williethepimp for their assistance on that. Couldn’t have gone any better had I scripted it. Or, should I say, had I scripted it any more than I did. I don’t think I’ve ever been more anal-retentive about every detail of a plan being on point than I was that day. I’m one of those selective perfectionists. If something isn’t too crucial, it can go how it goes. If it’s big to me, it’s gotta go exactly how I want it to. And this did.

And anyone that knows her and sees the effect she has on me would tell you, I’m winning. Actually shed a few putting that into words.

Yes, I’m way too happy. I originally intended for this to just be one paragraph, and a short one at that. Wanted to discuss something I saw at the Maze/Mint Condition concert we went to last night, but that’s for another post.

Back in a few.

(Oh, a totally random coincidence–only I would, without planning, propose on Prince’s birthday.)

June 7, 2007

Nigger=Teachers Pet?

Business…here’s this morning’s AM Jump.
Well, Bush is trying to pass another foolish racist off on the federal bench.  This time, the dude’s name is Leslie Southwick.  Check this here commentary on him.

The 5th Circuit is made up of Texas, Louisiana and Mississippi. According to the NAACP Legal Defense and Educational Fund, it is the federal judicial circuit with the highest percentage of minority residents.

So it seems axiomatic that the 5th Circuit does not need a judge who appeared untroubled when a white government employe referred to an African-American co-worker as “a good ole nigger.”

As a member of the Mississippi Court of Appeals, Southwick was in the 5-4 majority that voted to uphold the reinstatement of the white worker.

That was such an egregious decision that it was overturned unanimously — repeat, unanimously — by the Mississippi Supreme Court — repeat, Mississippi.

It’s interesting to note that the state hearing officer in the reinstatement case contended that the patently offensive phrase was used by the white employee as an equivalent of “teacher’s pet.”

Huh?

Yeah buddy.  Two things here.  First, there’s no way in the world anyone is legally entitled to the right to call someone a nigger at work.  None.

But let’s go another step, one that says all that need be said about this Southwick character.  The fact that he could even intimate that “nigger” is akin to “teacher’s pet” says a lot.  By equating those terms, he’s saying that this slur against black people indicates, by definition, subservience.  Further, it’s almost impossible to argue against the notion that Southwick thinks that black subservience is how things should be.

The black “anti-nigger” machine can step up and talk about how horrible the world is all the time.  Feel free, but I don’t think that’s got much to do with this one.  The argument over whether this is ever a friendly term has no place here because it was clearly not used as a friendly term in this case.  Even if it was intended to be used the same way as “teacher’s pet,” it wasn’t nobody’s friendly.

And this is who Dubya wants on the appeals court.  Now, remind me again why people got upset when Kanye West said Bush didn’t care about black people?

Someone with a legal mind is needed…could I get away with kicking someone’s ass at work for saying something like this?  I figure if I asked the dude to repeat himself that I’d establish pre-meditation.  But if I just flew across the table, would I be okay?

June 6, 2007

Links

Business…I think the Cavs may be the worst NBA Finalist ever.

I also think lunging at the Pope’s a horrific idea.  Buddy’s lucky he ain’t draw back a nub.  A short nub at that.

Meanwhile, women all around the country are buying Boost Plus for their men.  If the men complain, their ladies will tell them to “give it like a man.”

June 4, 2007

Paris Goes to Jail

Paris Hilton is going to jail.

Happens to the best of em sometimes. The worst, too.

But my girlfriend pointed out the most interesting part.

“I did have a choice to go to a pay jail,” Hilton said Sunday, without giving details. “But I declined because I feel like the media portrays me in a way that I’m not and that’s why I wanted to go to county, to show that I can do it and I’m going to be treated like everyone else. I’m going to do the time, I’m going to do it the right way.”

For a look at what “pay jail” is, check this from the Times.

Paris, dear…lemme explain something to you.

THERE IS NO RIGHT WAY TO DO TIME!!!

The right way to do time is not to do time at all. Keep your sorry ass outta jail. That’s the way to do time. The best way to do time is sleeping on the couch cuz your spouse can’t stand to be around you. You wake up, make breakfast, and pray for the best. That, Paris, is the best way to do time.

But jail? You make it as easy as possible. If I got sent to the joint, you best believe I’d go to pay jail. In fact, if I got sent to jail, I’d authorize every dime I’ve got to be put toward pay jail. Take all the equity out my house. Liquidate my assets. Just keep me out of free jail. Trust me–it ain’t the bargain you think it is. It’s free, and you still get overcharged for it. Sometimes, you don’t get what you pay for.

If Paris Hilton wants to change her image, she should pull a Mark Cuban and get a gig at Dairy Queen or something. Get hobby. Work with black kids or lepers or something.

But the last thing she wants to do is prove a point in jail. That doesn’t work out well for anyone. Whether showing your true proletariat spirit or fighting for your bologna sandwich, there’s not that much room for someone like her to prove a point in the pokey. Make it easy.

I won’t hate on her for it. Neither would most people, to be honest. Except for the folks with the hate in their blood. Different story entirely.

But if this is what she wants, I guess she should get it. Maybe she’ll learn some things about the world. MAybe she’ll learn how to make a grilled cheese sammich with her body heat and mattress. Maybe she’ll see just how sexy a mullet can be on a woman.

More than anything, I bet she’ll see that pay jail was the way to go.