December 28, 2009

It’s that time of year…

…to dog black men! Here’s another look at the multitudes of single black women in America.

There’s nothing new here, other than another reminder that Steve Fucking Harvey has become the go-to call on black men. Oy.

There are lots of problems with the way this story was presented, notably some of the statistical manipulations. That said, I’ve got one question to ask about this…

How do the experiences of black professional women compare to their white counterparts?

That’s what gets me about these stories. They’re always about black men vs. black women, and “vs.” is appropriate, given the confrontational tone stories like this take. But what are the reasons that white professional women have an easier time finding husbands?

Once we get into that, I’d like the answer to one question — are white women more likely to marry men below them in the class strata?

I ask that because much of that story centered around the pickiness of the women featured. That’s their right, of course. However, when you’re picky, you can be but so mad when you don’t get what you want. These women have lists of what they require in a man. Well, how many men fit the requirements? If that number is low, then you’re sure to end up with a great man…if you get a man. But, by definition, pickiness increases your likelihood to go home empty handed.

So, do white women behave differently? Why or why not?

But eh, why ask that when we can talk bad about black men, right?

I’m curious how many of these professional women would be willing to date a bright guy who isn’t a professional. I know plenty of cats like that, many of them my close friends. They’re the guys black women like those in that story want to find, save for their employment situations. How many of those women would date them?

Now, let’s flip that around. How many of those same women would be willing to date a ballplayer? The ballplayers, most likely, wouldn’t be as intelligent. He would, however, have a lot more money.

If these women wouldn’t date my friends, but would date the ballplayers, that’s their choice. However, if that’s the case, they couldn’t say that the problem is a shortage of men that fit their requirements. They’d have to say there’s a shortage of such men that are paid.

And that’s something entirely different.

To be clear — I’m not assigning blame to anyone. I’d just prefer that we look at this social phenomenon — one that merits discussion, I might add — as a collective issue, rather than talking about how hard this is on black women. Lemme tell you what’s rougher than black women’s inability to find men as educated as them — the fact that so many black men are capable of being the men they’re looking for, but don’t even have a fighting chance to get there.

That’s what’s rough.

This story on Nightline posited the shortcomings of black men as if they are entirely complicit for their misfortune, completely ignoring the systemic factors that contribute so greatly to those negative outcomes. Hell, there was a prosecutor discussing how disheartening it is to see so many black men in her courtroom, but no discussion of how much differently the legal system treats black men vis-a-vis everyone else! The core of the real, necessary, legitimate discussion was in that story, and it was quickly ignored.

That’s a helluva lot more important than why some black women can’t find men.

But no matter what, we’re not going to get anywhere discussing this topic until we look at it from a different initial position than the assumption of the inferiority of the black man.

December 19, 2009

…tell all these haters I’m back!

Unemployment is over.  Well, it’s effectively over.  Won’t see a check til next month, but I’ve got a gig.

Starting January 11, I’ll be broadcasting live on Hardcore Sports Radio, channel 98 on Sirius Satellite Radio, from 7-10 am weekday mornings.  The show will be called “The Morning Jones,” and it will be produced by my new company, Old Soul Productions.

(OK, I just wanted to put that in there.  Anybody with $125 in this state can start any sort of company they want.  But I always wanted to shout out my own label, so here it is –Old Soul Pro, what?!!?)

If you don’t have satellite, fret not.  We’re more concerned with whether you hear us than how you listen, so please check out their site and look for the link to listen.  Also, all shows are podcasted in entirety, so you can check them out during your work day if you can’t tune in live.

And check this out — they put out a press release that makes me sound so friggin’ cool that I had to make sure they weren’t talking about someone else.  That’s something, ain’t it?

I’m happy.  Very happy, in fact.  Here’s the biggest thing — I’ve got creative control.  I had a lot of control at the last gig, but we’re taking this to another level now.  You won’t hear much difference in how I talk, but I’ve got a plan for using music that I could never have instituted on 850 and 620.  Long of the short — I think music can be used to set the vibe and tempo of a show in a way more sports folks don’t consider and can’t harness.  We’re gonna put it on the road.

Plus, you know me.  I love music as much, if not more, than anything else.  You know what level I consume music on.  And you know I love to share music.  This show will reflect that.  I think you’ll enjoy it.

I’ve had this blog for five years now.  Many of you have followed the personal ups and downs, the hirings and firings, and the madness in my mind.  Well, this show will be more reflective of me than anything I’ve done.

If you’ve never heard my radio shows, or not listened because they’re sports, give this one a try.  My shows are less about sports than they are about life, with sports as the focal point.  But even people that don’t do sports could do the Lunch Break and Sports Saturday.  This show won’t be any different and, in fact, will probably be more universally accessible.

I’m in a good place right now.  I’m blogging for Page 2 again, and I’m glad to be back there and bck writing again.  But I love doing radio and feeling the personal connection it generates, and I’m ecstatic to get to continue that.

This could be the beginning of something big.  I think you’ll enjoy the ride.

(And if you were hoping I’d do something local to North Carolina — stay tuned.  If things go as I hope and kinda expect, we’ll have that taken care of.)

December 10, 2009

I’m not a fan…at least not of you

Lots of people are too cool for Facebook.  I can’t pretend I am.  Once, I met a woman, got her phone number, called her, and got no response.  Hit her up on Facebook and, two years later, we were engaged.  No way I can act too good for Facebook after that.

I am, however, too cool to be your fan.  Who?  You.

You, the realtor.

You, the fraternity member.

You, the rapper that became my Facebook friend trying to mooch off my friends to push you album that I’ll never listen to.

You, the model with no aspirations to be in a magazine.

You, dammit.  That’s who.  Who.

Nothing like looking down at the Blackberry to find out someone you don’t know wants you to be a “fan” of something you don’t know anything about.  I’ll never knock people for trying to push their businesses.  Get your money.

But perhaps we need a different term than “fan.”  What’s an alternative term?  I really don’t know.

But I know that I’m a fan on Facebook of the following people/places/things…

Bob Marley, Randy Watson and Sexual Chocolate, The Beast, Roland TR-808, Cook Out, Pink Floyd, Devin the Dude, Blue Bell Ice Cream, Dave Chappelle, The Wire, Purple Rain, Serena Williams, aden, UGK4Life, Parliament/Funkadelic.

Now, ask yourself — do you, your homeboys, or your album belong on that list?

Did you write something as hot as “No Woman, No Cry?”  Do you believe the children are our future?  You ride for me like Freelon and Aden ride for me?  Can you make the most beautifullest “boom” the ear has ever heard?  Did you ever perform live at Pompeii?  Are you the greatest TV show ever?  Did your catsuit bring me and my father closer?  Are you Eddie Hazel?

None of those, eh?  Then you’ve got a looooong way to go before I become your fan.

So quit asking.

December 8, 2009

Tiger, DO NOT GO ON OPRAH

According to multiple reports, Tiger Woods’ cabal of advisors want him to go on Oprah. Apparently, they want to see how much worse things could get.

Don Imus would receive a warmer reception at the Million Man March than Tiger would on Oprah. No one would hug him. There would be no applause. There would be no explanation that millions of women – women watching TV in the middle of the afternoon, mind you — want to hear, let alone consider.

Tiger’s Q rating notwithstanding, this isn’t an Oprah story. Tiger’s Thanksgiving night sounds Springer-ish. His lifestyle was on a collision course with an envelope on Maury. There’s a reason folks go on those shows to fix their problems — because Oprah isn’t going for their nonsense. And in the last two weeks, Tiger has become, in public, one of those people.

Oprah would not provide what Woods is seeking – redemption. It would be Tiger, fidgeting in the footprints Tom Cruise left on the couch, a studio audience and a host with two decades of history to indicate that she isn’t trying to hear it, either.

After weeks of refusing to speak publicly about his troubles, Tiger’s best move is to stay that course. If his wife forgives him, the world will. After all, we’re not the ones that have to live with him.

But good luck convincing other people’s wives. Not even Oprah could make that happen, and there’s no reason to think she wants to.