Kirk just sent me an IM talking about a line he missed from a Chappelle’s Show sketch, which prompted me to think about what my favorite sketches were.  Seemed a perfect time to get the lists back going.
25.  The Wrap It Up Box.  I’m not even sure this sketch is so funny.  But when someone provides me something I can use in my everyday life, it’s worth something.  I can’t tell you how many places I’ve been where I wished I had that box.
24.  Piss on You.  The R. Kelly parody.  At times, it’s unnecessarily sophomoric.  However, you can’t tell me that you didn’t laugh quite a few times.  Which begs the question–have we reached the point where people have totally forgotten that R. Kelly’s got some serious ‘splaining to do?  That said, “she be callin’ you Kelly when your name is Tommy” is so funny that I listen to “I’m a Flirt” just to make sure I hear that line.  Plus, on the radio, he ain’t wearing a pink mask.  The pink mask phase was totally unforgivable.
23.  The Three Daves.  This is the one where he went through how he’s handled situations differently as he’s gotten older.  I can just see myself telling my son “I’m broke, nigga, I’m broke!”  And then him telling my wife that I’m cussin’ in the house again.
22.  Nelson Mandela Boot Camp.   At the risk of sounding diasporically blasphemous, there’s something really funny about Mandela punching kids and smoking their dope.  In the jungle, the mighty jungle…
21.  Calvin Gets a Job at Wac Arnold’s.   Thank you, Dave, for mocking the preposterous notion that working at McDonald’s is a significant contribution to the ghetto.  Yeah, that’s uplifting.  It may stop a cat from sticking somebody up, but that’s doing as much for uplifting the poor as having a Diet Coke with your Big Mac is good for your health.
20.  World Series of Dice.  Two words–Leonard Washington.  Two more–Ashy Larry.
19.  The Niggar Family.  Actually, The Wetback Family made it.
18.  Law and Order.   This is the one where white collar criminals and blue collar criminals are treated inversely to how it goes in real life.  “There are so many amendmentssss…I can only choose oneeeee…FIIIIIF!!!”
17.  Wu-Tang Financial.   “You gotta diversify your bonds, nigga!”  The humor, of course, comes from the fact that those dudes surely do know how to manage your money.
16.  When Keepin it Real Goes Wrong.  All of ’em.   The best, to me, was the one where the chick goes bonkers over someone playin’ on her phone.  What is it with people and folks playin’ on their phone that drives them over the edge?  I got cussed out by a 60 year old man when i was 13 for playin’ on his phone, and I swear, I just dialed a wrong number twice.
15.  Trading Spouses.  This time, we’re going interracial!  Another Leonard Washington classic.  But here’s my question–did anyone see on the real “Trading Spouses” when they put the infamous God Warrior–of whatever she calls herself–with some militant dude in Tampa?  I missed the second part of the episode, but the first part was the greatest piece of unintentional comedy I’d ever witnessed.  Please tell me if you’ve seen it, or if you know when it’s coming back on.
14.  Sam Jackson Beer.  I’m not a huge Sam Jackson fan.  Very good actor, but his choice of role kinda bothers me at times.  Dave played on that one flawlessly.  “It’ll get you drunk!  You’ll be fuckin’ fat girls in no time!”  Ahhh, gotta love alcohol.  Or not.
13.  Come on Be My Baby Tonight.  When Dave broke that dude form “The Real World” out and had him sing that silly song as the musical number.  Why’s this funny?  Nothing like when someone doesn’t realize he’s the joke.  He sang his heart out, too.
12.  Charlie Murphy Hollywood Stories–Prince.  The premise of Prince playing ball is funny enough.  “Shoot the J.  Shoot it!” is amazing.  Pancakes?  Well, that couldn’t be invented.
11.  Popcopy.  First, it was a perfect use of the tragically limited Michael Rappaport.  Second, it brought Scarface back out.  Third, that’s really what it’s like to go to a copy place.  Also, I’ve pretended to be the manager at a job.  It’s the best way to get a manager to leave you alone.
11/10.  Tyrone Biggums.  I just put the main Biggums sketches together, largely because I accidentally made a list of 24 instead of 25 and forgot about “Fear Factor.”  Him on “Fear Factor” was pretty good, but nothing beat him talking to a room full of students.  Crack addiction ain’t funny, but it can be hard not to laugh at Tyrone.  “That children is the first time I…”  Oh man, funny.  And the demand for cash reminds me of hte time my daddy messed up and paid the cable man some cash to clean out our gutters.  Dude was out without us knowing.  Shoulda known things were bed when he was begging me for a cigarette five minutes after he got to the house, even though he passed about 5 stores on the way in.
9.  Wayne Brady.  The shock value of this was enough, but the stuff that happened was perfectly scripted.  It also showed just how talented Wayne Brady is, even if you don’t like what he does.
8.  Ask a Black Dude.   I’m not the biggest Paul Mooney fan.  But when you watch the outtakes and realize that, in spite of how serious he sounds on these clips, he’s fighting laughter the whole time, the clips take on a totally different level of humor.  Note–this clip should not be so high, but I was running lower than I realized, and I needed to plug something in.  Oops.  You get what you pay for.
7.  Blank.  Yeah, I can’t count.  Too busy to fix it.  Think of this like the center square on a bingo card.
6.   Reparations 2003.  If you haven’t seen it, I can’t help you.  Some think it was embarrassing.  I think it was genius.  Totally absurd, but I’m okay with that.  Goodness, man.  This is “Coming to America” funny.
5.  Racial Draft.  Absolute genius.  From black folks trying to give Condoleezza Rice and O.J. away to the Elian Gonzalez bit, this is a fantastic example of subversive racial commentary.
4.  Clayton Bigsby, the Black White Supremacist.   The beauty of this is how it points out the absurdity of white supremacy.  Some folks don’t like it when you talk about white supremacy because the true definition doesn’t adhere to the inflammatory connotation the term has in common parlance, but I can so easily see how someone could not know he was black and still hate black people.  Hell, people know they’re black and hate black people all the time.  Sketches like this are why I say unequivocally believe Dave’s a genius.
3.  Rick James.   This is Dave’s defining moment, and it’s classic.  The thing I love about this is that, while Rick James’ character is totally absurd, Dave’s portrayal of him is perfectly reserved.  It’s a caricature, but not quite.  It’s hard to explain what I’m saying, but a great impression comes from subtlety.  To me, the little things are what makes this so good.
2.  Black Bush.   M-A-R-S…
1.  Player Haters Ball.   First, let it be known I think “Pimps Up, Ho’z Down” is a fantastic documentary.  Absolutely fascinating in the same way a great documentary on the Third Reich is fascinating–terrible stuff, but very well done.  But this?  Man, why hadn’t I heard some of these lines when I was in high school?  I would have been the king of rankin’ on fools.  “What can I say about your suit that hasn’t been said about Afghanistan?  It looks bombed out and depleted.”  Genius.  And Ice-T coming with “next nigga say something when I’m talkin’s gettin shot, please beleedat.”
In fact, I think I’ll watch that one now.

Business…here’s why I could care less that a couple of guys in the draft said they got high before.  What a coincidence that this story broke right before 4.20.  Someone has a sense of humor, apparently.
Back on the grind I go.  Might can post later.
BTW, I’m trying to post more.  I’ve been doing a million things at once lately, but I miss blogging.  Always a highlight of my day.

I watched “Bowling for Columbine” for the first time last night.  No way in the world that should have won an Oscar.  It was interesting, but unquestionably slanted in a way I don’t think documentaries should be, even if the documentary falls in line with my politics (simply put, I hate guns).
That said, it raised some very good points.  Most notable among them was the unfortunate tendency of the media to accentuate the violent and negative aspects of society, something that contributes to the building racism and xenophobia in this country.
After watching that flick, it was fitting that I caught my man Bruce Feldman’s Insider blog, where he mentioned that we’d be better served to try to use the Virginia Tech massacre as a time to look at the good people are doing.  At this point, it’s far more constructive to do that rather than to attempt to understand the insanity of the gunman, especially since it’s nearly impossible to make sense of insanity.  That’s like trying to turn lead to gold.
He linked this page that profiled the victims of the shooting.  Instead of thinking of them as bit players to the tragedy, we should take some time to bring them to the forefront.  It’s a shame those people were lost, but the world was a better place for having a lot of them, even if just for a short time.

Business…respect the NFL’s gangsta.
Police–calm down.
Dude–calm down.
Now, a funny.  A couple of teenagers stopped by my door to get “votes” for some leadership contest they were in.  They said they had to show they were able to present themselves respectfully and professionally to get the votes.  I was down to help them out.
Until they told me they needed me to buy some books.  Lil’ suckers sandbagged me.  They ain’t want votes.  They wanted paper.
Anyway, I told them I was a strapped for cash, so I couldn’t help them out.  They gon’ learn not to come in the middle of the month.
Their reply?
“We don’t need cash.  Coins will work.”  Dude said this while he did a swiping motion with his hand.
Nice try, pimpin.