Who wants a lesson in irony?

So Saturday, I figure I may as well have some fun with Carolina-Duke.  Unlike most, I didn’t think it was wrong to be fanatical about the game in the wake of Eve Carson’s death.  It’s a basketball game, an excuse to act silly and channel whatever emotion you have into a petty obsession with the success of one team or the failure of another.  In fact, my take on rivalries from 2007…

Is this new rule petty of Duke? Of course. But pettiness is all good when it comes to this rivalry. Rivalries should not be friendly. They should be full of arrogance, insecurity, profanity, provincial disdain, and outright contempt (things Carolina-Duke is loaded with). Good sense and fairness should apply only to the refs when it comes to this game. Respect for the opposition is noble and is the foundation of Carolina-Duke, but it’s not so important that it should interfere with the pleasure of being petty on game day, whether you’re calling in to talk radio or checking IDs at K-ville.

That’s what it is, man.  (BTW, one of my proudest moments was finding out a kid at Carolina quoted that graf on his Facebook page.  Don’t know why that was so cool to me.)
Now, let’s move forward to Saturday.  I kinda put it out there that I’m not a big Duke fan.  I quoted a line I had in a piece about J.J. Redick two years ago.

If Duke played the Ku Klux Klan, I’d root for a 0-0 tie.

The word for the day, ladies and gentlemen, is hyperbole.  High-per-bo-lee.  Said a few other things, too.  I honestly don’t remember what they were.
Somebody at least paid close attention, cuz a handful of Dukies aren’t too thrilled.  Such is their right, and I probably went a litle farther in the name of fun than I should have.  No problem admitting that.  That sounds entirely plausible.
That said, I just have to say this.  If you’re going to question my intelligence or my producer Shannon’s, please do so in a way that doesn’t make me spit up laughing.  Go as hard in the paint as you like–so long as you don’t commit any offensive fouls, if you get my drift–but get off a good shot.
Check this thread on the Duke Basketball Report.  It’s pretty fascinating, especially if you speak code.  Go to the second page.  The first post reads as follows…

Marginally literate at best….. You should hear his (mental midget) show producer(and want a be co-host) Shannon(formerly known as Intern Shannon). Coulder not utter an intelligent sentence if his life depended on it. Just call them dumb and dumber.

Not that this counts for too much, but Shannon and I have a couple of bachelor’s and three master’s degrees between us.  There’s someone out there that might be able to vouch for our collective ability to read.  At the very least, we could pull middle linebacker Wonderlic scores.
But for kicks, I decided to put the word “coulder” in the spell check.  A big ol’ red line popped up.
Know why?  Because “coulder” is not a word.
You went hard, sir.  Then you had to go off and trip and bust your ass in front of all those people.  That’s gotta suck.

4 Comments

  • Posted March 12, 2008 3:29 pm 0Likes
    by Kirk

    Cock shot?

  • Posted March 12, 2008 3:45 pm 0Likes
    by Jackie

    Dook sucks. Hyperbole does not.

  • Posted March 12, 2008 3:48 pm 0Likes
    by FredBatiste, A Weapon of Mass Destruction

    Um Kirk..now play nice..It coulder been someone else.
    Coulder? And there are alleged dookies? I didn’t know Dook had kinesiology and general studies in their catalogs.
    That is so big-SEC-school-just-a-stone’s-throw-from-the-hood-in-Baton-Rouge-LA

  • Posted March 17, 2008 1:52 pm 0Likes
    by Jake

    “Coulder” screaming & LOL. That junk has to be in the top ten flubs in blog commentary history. Just plain ol’ ignant. Dude doesn’t rate the correct spelling.

Leave a comment

The Email
Jones

Mailing List

Become a subscriber of our online community and receive occasional news straight to your inbox! Thanks for your support.