These, ladies and gentlemen, are the Dutch Masters. Dutch Masters, introduce yourselves on the comments, please.
And this is the score from their last game. In a gym full or drunken teenagers, the Dutch beat the brakes off a team that calls itself Studly. Yeah, Studly is as terrible as it sounds. Couldn’t beat a one-legged man in an ass-kicking contest.
That’s right, the Dutch is back.
For those relatively new to the site, the Dutch Masters are a rec league team in Chapel Hill that I help Aden coach. To say the least, they’re an interesting set of kids. Background reading on them can be found here, here, here, here, and here.
The Dutch has played a few games, and I apologize for not updating you on their progress sooner. Actually, I’m making that apology because Baller Mike was upset that they hadn’t gotten shine on the ‘Net this season. At least that means he reads the site, so I’m okay with that complaint.
But I was waiting on a decisive victory to bring them back onto Virtual Bomaniland. They won a game when I wasn’t there, but yesterday was the first victory I attended. And I didn’t wanna update again until I took a picture, which wouldn’t have been cool to take after a loss.
So there they are. What have you missed in the world of the Dutch thus far?
For one, they show up a lot more grounded this year. Well, check Sneaky Pete out in the pic above (he’s got the locks). He found something mundane really funny during the last game. They’re also playing better, even though we concluded last year they played better with some inspiration. I’m really not sure what to do about that. The Sneakster–who also has beats–was realyl under control this game. But since he reads this, I shouldn’t be encouraging him. Really, those kids confuse me at times.
At the game on Saturday, a ruckus nearly broke out. Since the ref was allergic to blowing his whistle–unless there wasn’t really a foul–the game was an absolute hackfest. I think every one of those upstanding gentlemen wanted to fight that day. As one of the grown men partially responsible for their behavior, I was really hoping they wouldn’t.
That was until some kid from the other team I call “Snacks” tried to decapitate Cliff, one of the newcomers. At that point, I was prepared to knock his block. Big or not, I’m not gettin’ my ass whooped by a teenager.
But I’m also not allowed to fight teenagers.
Here’s the best part, though–my man Cliff looked that big joker in the eye with no fear of the ruckus. The Dutch has some heart, I learned that day. Talk of fighting is not smack talk. Oh, and Big O–he with the fiery red hair–apparently stomped a kid and his vehicle out a few weeks ago.
Respect the Dutch, baby.
The slogan for the year–the Return of the Red Eye. Since they wear red shirts and all. Also, the red eyes in the picture above are from the camera. Give the kids some credit.
But we’re looking good. Per usual, regular updates on the Dutch are forthcoming. Some of you are thinking, “who gives a damn about a team of high school basketball players.” Really, these are some of the most interesting people I’ve been around. You’ll learn to love ’em if you don’t already.

6 Comments
by Ben
I’m just gonna come out and say this.
White people and dreadlocks don’t mix.
by williethepimp
we need to transplant these cats to dsa. they’d fit right in at the school of arts
by Fred Batiste, A Weapon of Mass Destruction
So this team named Studly, were they wearing low-rider shorts and lil peasant shirts like other “metro” guys…
Studly gotta be one of the “sweetest” names I’ve ever heard a team named…Totally opposite from a strong name like “Team Negro.”
And anytime a dude got a food-based nickname, you know said dude has some metabolic issues….
I wish the Dutch luck…I’m down with the Return of the Red Eye, now if only y’all can get Mountain Dew Code Red, and some other endorsements
Keep in mind this comment is left by a man who has created a team on NCAA called the Negro State Blackstars that plays in the WMD’s hometown of Maringouin, LA.
by Kirk
If the rest of y’all are up for it, I’m willing to pitch in and help pay for the Dutch Masters to become an ABA team. At the very least, I would have an excuse to go to a Charlotte Krunk game.
by Baller Mike
How are you going to cut me, the glue that holds our chaotic mess together, out of the photograph. Baller Mike commands more respect. My agent, Mr Rosenhaus will be contacting you shotly, Bo.
by Baller Mike
How are you going to cut me, the glue that holds our chaotic mess together, out of the photograph. Baller Mike commands more respect. My agent, Mr Rosenhaus will be contacting you shotly, Bo.