So I was listening to the boPod in the office when Mya’s “Best of Me” remix came on. I’m a big fan of that song, purely because of the Jigga verses. I could go on all day long about those verses, but this was the first time in a few years I’d actually paid much attention that what Mya was saying. You’ll have to forgive me, but she rarely has anything to say that I find worth listening to.
But I digress.
Should you be unfamiliar with the song–or just don’t remember it that well–the whole premise is that she doesn’t know what to do because she’s got a man, but she’s met a dude that’s really captivated her. If I’m interpreting the song right, he also kisses her on the neck a few times.
Her internal question?
“Should I stay? Should I go? I don’t know.”
Uhhh, yes you do, moron. Take your stupid ass home.
But you know what? She may as well stay. She’s already done enough to get sent packing by her man. Maybe she should have asked the question sooner.
For purposes of intellectual exploration, though, let’s assume that she asked the question sooner.
It’s one of those queries with only one right answer. You know what you should do. It’s just a matter of whether you’ll actually do it. And, in this case, it was too late.
It kinda made me think about part of the reason I’m not particularly enamored with contemporary music. It’s not that things ain’t like they were in my golden youth or anything. It’s because pop music is littered with themes that i find to be either stale or just plain stupid.
This song is just plain stupid. You can’t pose this one as though it’s really a quandary. Were the song about the guilt she was feeling, then I’d look at it differently. But this “I don’t know what to do” bullshit is met from me with nothing but a cocked brow and a great big, “g’head wit dat dere.”
But when I was 19 or so, I really may have listened to that song and said, “you gotta be in that situation to understand what she’s talking about.” Now, I’m 26. I’ve been in that situation before. I’ve messed up in that situation, too. But not for a minute did I pretend like it was some moral dilemma. It was a battle between what I wanted to do right then and what I knew I was supposed to do.
You don’t need to fetch Nietschze for that one. There’s nothing deep about balancing whether something will be fun with whether that fun thing will be harmful. If that balance were so tough to navigate, I’d probably be a heroin addict.
But it ain’t. So I’m not.
Anyway, this is what I find in all kinds of stuff I listen to. I listen a lot less hip hop than I used to because it’s starting to feel like I’ve heard it all before. That isn’t to say what’s out now is worse than what was out when I was in high school. It’s just that I’ve been listening to much of the same stuff since I was in high school.
And I’m bored.
Nostalgia makes it possible for me to go back and listen to stuff from the younger days. And there are some classics that will bang forever, no matter how cliche they are (for example, check Young Jeezy’s Let’s Get It: Thug Motivation 101). But it ain’t so easy for me to listen to a new jack hit me with this stuff and get me interested.
I find now that I’m deepening my familiarity with the classics. I also spend a bit of time charting the progressions of my favorite artists. But it’s very, very rare I hear something new that really invigorates me.
I just need something new. Or maybe I need to be younger. Not sure which.
18 thoughts on “Another Moment in Growing Up”
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Psst Bo…your tastes have matured, that’s all. I feel ya because I find myself seeing ads for new CDs coming out, and I think it’s a skit or joke ad, only to find out it’s real.
Reminds me of that song by Heather Headley–Me Time. I thought it was a nice song, would sing along to the refrain while in the car. Then it dawned on me what she was really saying. She’s pretty much begging her man to let her out the house. It’s kinda depressing to hear it now.
I doubt Mya even wrote that song and I think the theme was something just to catch female interest. I think girls, in a massive generalization that I’m making, like anyone else, like hearing songs that really hit home. From a man’s point of view, the question of should I go or should I stay may sound stupid and silly, but there’s a lot of girls that really don’t know the answer to that question. I think that song was catered to the females, and then the remix brought in the guys via Jigga. Either way, I don’t think it was written as a brain teaser, more of a typical pop song – appealing to the masses.
You gotta be younger, man.
“Pop” music is a young person’s thing. They hear Mya, or anyone else for that matter, talking about some stuff that us older folks consider largely trivial and it hits them because they’ve never heard anything like it before. They don’t realize that most subjects have been artistically beaten into the ground over and over again (what really gets me is when a new artist covers a classic and these young fools think it’s original).
But they’ll learn, and the music will lose its luster for them, just as it has for us.
I’m with you on the classics though. I stea…”obtain” maybe two or three new albums a year. That’s about the number of worthy new releases, I think. The rest are stuff from back in the day from those who pioneered what’s popular today.
I’ve said it before, but I find most popular modern R and B insulting. Many of the themes are not radically different from older, far superior R and B, but just that little tweak (plus, you know, talent) makes all the difference.
Even folks from previous generations, who had a greater selection of good popular music were on some “music just aint the same as it was in my day” stuff. It’s just a part of maturing.
Revisiting familiar classics is great, but nothing makes me feel like I do when I happen across a great classic album that I’ve never heard. Also try delving into a sub-genre you don’t typically listen to.
Good new stuff is tough to find, but it’s definitely out there. With the convenience of the internet and file-sharing technology, you’d think that finding it would be much easier, but that’s not the case at all. Sometimes satellite radio helps. I don’t trust print reviews, so I try to find music bloggers with similar tastes.
There is enough quality music (old and new) to keep you busy for several lifetimes. The great thing is that good music will always be there for you to discover.
This reminds me of that Rihanna song that was all over this summer. It really irked me. I think it was called, “Unfaithful”, and she warbled badly and overdramatically about how her infidelity was killing her man (he knew, but didn’t confront her….where does this happen?) and she didn’t want to beeeeeee…(big pause) “a murderahhh!”
She provoked murderous thoughts in me with that one.
That Rihanna song was the last straw for me. i just shut off the radio on the commute after that put a bunch of the mp3s on a bunch of cds and just rolled with that. It is true what you are saying Bo that as we mature form experiences in life we find the situations expressed in these songs to be more and more ridiculous. But then again I also remember my older cousins getting on my about the way rap has turned into a more gangsta form in the early 90s and how they thought most of the rappers were wannabe gangstas like everybody in N.W.A except Easy-E. Maybe with each new generation the same criticism will be leveled no matter what.
you’re find just the way you are. it’s the music that needs to be better. i must have an age restriction on my ipod. the number of folk from today’s r&b/hip-hip/pop are so limited. i like music from when someone was saying something. frankly it’s not happening today.
and i don’t really listen to the radio, so i have no idea who some of the “hit” artists are today.
The Jay verse on Best of me MAKES the song…not that what he is saying is all that ground breaking…but its a frightening flow all the same.
Music is just juvenile. I think it feeds back into the whole idea of rappers lying about their ages…
we excuse a lot of what we hear because its coming from children (or at least youngins)
We wouldn’t be so forgiving if it was coming from 30-35 yr old men and women. (R. Kelly excluded, of course)
I have a great time when I put on my “College Rap” playlist on the ol’ iPod and iTunes!
RunDMC
Beastie Boys
Whodini
LL Cool J
Eric B. & Rakim
Public Enemy
Grandmaster Flash and the Furious Five
Kurtis Blow
…and for REAL nostalgia, “The Sugarhill Gang”
Fifty Cent and his ilk just plain SUX.
And don’t get me started on R&B of today. Destiny’s Child, etc., (uuugh)
“I’m a grumpy old man. That’s the way it was in our day and we LIKED IT!” (Dana Carvey)
There is an absence of songwriters that can tell a story with a song. The greatest songs ever are basically musical narratives. It’s getting harder to find even a rapper who can tell a decent story; and that genre was tailor-made for narratives. Most artists have said, “since I have a phat beat and a kick-ass producer I can spit 6 verses of crap and call it a #1”. Not even 10 years ago you actually had to put some thought into what you would say on a record. This is the reason my tastes have grown as I’ve gotten older. If I’m going to be fed crap, I might as well search for something different from the same old crap.
great post. I think it really is just a sign of maturity. It seems like most music nowadays either irritates me or just plain pisses me off. And I keep thinking “I’m only 30, I’m too young to be a grumpy old man.” But thats the way it is. Now I gotta put on some Earth, Wind, and Fire to calm my nerves.
i think there’s a certain amount of nostalgia in that statement. Crappy music has been made since people started making music…but because we’ve mercifully forgotten the bad (I hope to do the same in 20 years with Pretty Ricky), when you look back, you forget all the bad stuff and it seems like folks only put out “good” music back in the day.
Wow. I think you are putting way too much emphasis/pressure/responsibility into the song writers hands. Think for one second. The song lyrics versus Jay’s rap lyrics are really mutually exclusive. At the time of the song Mya was all of what?……18-19 maybe 20. What goes on in a young adult’s mind besides relationship fodder and sex.
I think you should really just chalk the song up to being what it is, popcorn music.
For all of those who are looking for a young “cat” who can really rock shit, check for Lupe Fiasco’s Food & Liquor album. Tracks 5-19 do not disappoint. I firmly believe if he had chose “The Instrumental” as his first single, he would have at least hit gold status by now. Lupe is real hip-hop. I challenge anyone who has heard the album and wishes to disagree.
Jaeda, you’re right to an extent. I think that nostalgia for whatever “golden age” you represent ignores lesser material; but something happens to all genres of popular art once the corporate juggernaut sees that the genre can be more than a typical moneymaker and has the potential to dominate mainstream culture: cliche and conformity reigns almost to the point of parody as originality is crushed. There is less diversity on pop radio and TV than ever before. Songs, videos, artists, and images in rotation only a few years back would never get burn today. People can debate the relative quality of music from different time periods, but the diveristy issue is as plain as day.
Shot Clock, Lupe is OK. He’s definitely smart and talented, but there’s just way too much hype. He’s certainly not bad, and I like what he’s trying to do, but he’s not THAT good. Maybe it’s wishful thinking or just each era of fans needing to exalt one of their own. More important, his album isn’t THAT good. I’m not sure people will remember it in a few months. But then again, I don’t buy into the “real” vs “fake” or “rap” vs “hip hop” stuff.
You’re absolutely right, Lupe’s album is not THAT good. But for a young guy, in a world where rappers just seem to mirror each other, it’s a fresh change. I just thought I’d bring some more ears to his music since the looming theme has been that current hip-hop is stagnant. Anyways, I agree with you again.
Bo’s piece pretty much hit on something that I’d been complaining about; I’m tired of the same old themes and gimmicks. How many guest spots, remixes, and collabos are really needed for a hip-hop…or worse, an R&B track? Can we ever go back to the days where music stars (they certainly aren’t all ‘artists’) didn’t name-drop high-end brands that most listeners can’t afford?
Maybe my tastes have matured somewhat as well. I appreciate it when I’m taken somewhere I haven’t been before musically. That doesn’t happen nearly as often as I’d like to admit.